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This year was quite hard for me. I fell in love, with the wrong guy. I let it get the best of me, even after all my friends told me it wouldnt work out. They said he would break my heart like a glass on cement. They all told me, and I didnt believe. He told me he'd be there when times got rough, and when they did he just dissapeared. He was my best guy friend, and he never even knew I loved him. Its funny cause everyone in school kept asking if we were going out, and as much as i wanted to scream yes and tell him I love him, I couldnt. But now, my lifes back on track, and we still talk but just as friends. Its hard for me to get over him, but i think im slowly getting back on track. Ill forgive for all the pain hes caused. but ill never forget. When I walk down the hallways ill think of
all of the times he stood over me, sneaking in little kisses on the head or cheek, or the next time I get into a fight, ill think about the time he protected me. During lunch, ill think of all the times he held my hand under the table as he rested his head on the table, while I rubber his hair, so no one would realize we were in love. Nobody really understands why I loved him, or whyim so attracted to him. To be honest I dont know. But I do know that what we had was something I cant trade, and I cant go back in time to fix. And even if I could, I dont think I would. As wrong as things were for he and I, it doesnt matter anymore. We're talking again, just not in that manner. Id rather have him as my best guy friend, then not know him at all. Hes always gonna be monkey, and im always
be monster. Im sure years from now, he wont remember ever even liking me, but i will always remember him. I dont know what to say....but for my other friends that dont like him, and thinks its wrong im still talking to him, im sorry that this may seem wrong for me to write, but its my venting out. Dont take it personally. It needed to come out. Nothing is gonna happen between him and I. But yeah.
