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where to begain; the world feels like it is winding around me intertwining with every lim of my boby. so you know there is one thing i wish, wish i was yonug again. when ilife seemed so easy and the the gass was my play ground. when you look at the the world as it was new. my lief seem like it is flying before my eyes. i did not even have a seconded to breath. all i wanted was to freeze time and rewind it but would i lose the things i love most in this life? or is it just an illosion of what might have been. i lost my self years ago and i wish i could bring who i was back.the sprit i had and the love and respect for people that i had back then. here my storry i am just going to call my self lena. so i woke up! finding myself face to face with a knife to my neck. what had CHANGED HIM HE HAD SEEM SO DIFFERENT. WAS IT ME? WHY DID NO ONE SAY ANY THING? WHY DID I SCREAM? WHY COULD I RAT HIM OUT? WAS IT FEAR OR TRUST? I AM NOT SURE THESE DAYS. BUT THAT DAY I KNOW HE WAS NOT THE Same. but i sill dont know why? things seemed fine. we would hang out like normal teens and i loved himed him, like nornal seventen girl crush. i just wanted him for my own. he was always lying about what he was doing . not that he need to and i know he loved some one else. i could see it in his eyes. i just did not want to believe. i lied to my self. i hurt my self to love him. i wanted him to want me and be my friend to love me. that did not work one thing i could tell young gurls these days. don't think that if you play the friend with benift key you will end up on top. it dose not all ways work that way and if it dose is because the person love you enough to stay. they love you enough not to hurt you. i went crazy over nothing and hurt my self to love someone who cared nothing about me and so i wanted to tell my story maby for some one else it wont end the same way. Part !
