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Dont tell me that the sky's the limit when theres foot prints on the moon.
The next time my name rolls off your tongue choke on it BITCH!
"Boys are like clowns, they try to make you laugh, yet they scare you at the same time."
Sometime reading is good, I say reading is knowledge, knowledge, is power, power is corruption, corruption is a crime, and crime is doesn't pay you. so if you read you'll be broke."
i don't suffer from insanity i enjoy every minute of it
Don’t make someone your everything, because when they leave, you have nothing.
Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That’s why we call it the present.
It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.
silent is golden, duck-tape is silver
If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you
Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.
Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it
No sense in being pessimistic It wouldn’t work anyway.
We should forgive our enemies, but only after they’ve been taken out and shot.
It's always darkest before it turns absolutely pitch black.
If you ever become a mother, can I have one of the puppies?
Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
Did you know that when someone annoys you, it takes forty-two muscles to frown, But it only takes four muscles to extend your arm out and smack'em in the head.
There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
You are as useful as a one legged man in an a.ss kicking contest
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
He has Van Gogh's ear for music.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
