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Dear Jesse, I just wanted to know how you're doing. I know I haven't wrote to you since. Maybe thats why we don't really talk anymore. It 's really sad because I don't know what I'm doing here and I feel confused and lost. You are all I know. You're all I ever think of. It's just so hard for me to focus on the people and the life around me because I don't feel it is my burdun to bare. I don't feel like it belongs to me. The thing that scares me the most is that I have to face the truth. We're not getting any closer. I realize I'm hurting myself as I lie. I'm hurting myself at this very moment because I know you won't read any of my letters so you won't be reading this one. I don't know why I bother cracking up as if you really care. You probably never think of me. You probably can't stand me. You hate me. I don't know why I bother. I've been in hell, Jesse and I know you understand what that feels like. But you can't let that happen to someone else, Jesse. Especilly someone who cares for you and you don't even think of that person. I feel like such a hypocrite because I won't let anyone love me or get close to me. I feel as if I'm waiting for you. I should of known that I'm waiting for nobody. But I don't think of you as that. I see you as every thing to me. To me, you are the whole world . You're second next to God, to me. I wish that you would reply and tell me to, ''Get lost'' or ''Suck it up''. Anything just to let me know that you know I'm still here and you got my message. Tell me that I need to let you go and I should let somebody else love me for a change.With that, I'll know that you at least have some empathy for me. I will promise to stop going to parks and places that we use to go to. It just makes me sad when I think of the good times we once had. It makes me think of YOU & I.
I wish you a happy life. Remeber me, please, please remeber me. Goodbye, Jesse
This is my last love letter to you.
