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To Whomever Found My Body;
Damn it, I wish I wouldn't have kicked the chair so far or tied the noose so tight. Maybe I should have just sprung for a whore. Alicia , you cheap, dumb dead bastard.
If you're reading this and you're not my mother, then most likely I am hanging by a noose from the rafters with a smile on my face, a zucchini up my ass and covered in a wad of jiz and nacho cheese.
Mom, if that's you reading this: I was actually murdered, my corpse was desecrated by those "damn, dirty, faggot-jew-muslim-hippie gypsies" you always warned us as kids about, they made me write this note to cover up their horrible, heinous crime and you should stop reading now.
P.S I hope all that jesus and god and heaven bullshit is real.
I knew I should have had a spotter.
Oh well, at least I died doing something I loved: Asphyxiating myself while watching Blue's Clues.
-Alicia
avalicious added this comment 2009-06-16 09:47:28-05:00
true or false
avalicious added this comment 2009-06-16 09:47:28-05:00
true or false