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penguinmaster

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You can still rate me, add me, fan me, comment me, whatever, but it'll be a bit before I get back to you.

I'm tired of waking to another day filled with lying, backstabbing, cheating, drama, and self-hatred. I hate the fact that I hate myself as much as I do. I always thought I was incapeable of hating anyone, but yet, I can. I'm in hope to find what I need to find on my little break and I promise my friends (who actually care) that I won't do anything stupid. I just want to pick up the pieces and go home safely. I want to return to Glogster refreshed, happy, and happy with myself and my surroundings. I want to be able to wake up and be happy that I've got another day to live instead of seeing it as doom and gloom.

I'm seriously considering leaving glogster. I'm tired of all the bullshit on this site and I'd do anything for things to be quiet and settle down. I think people need to learn respect and how to treat others before coming here. This site was made for people to make friends, and to express what they like and how they feel freely. Not for drama to start, to create liars, cheaters, and backstabbers. And you know who you are. I'm tired of people saying they're a friend and turn around and use it against me and my friends. I'm tired of people walking all over me to get what they want because they know I'd do anything to keep my friends happy. I mean, what would it take for someone to be honest on this site about anything? Nothing. Yeah, I've made some great friends (You know who) but, I've made some great friends who turn out ot be nothing more than liars and backstabbers and who've hurt me and my other friends. I can't stand the fact of coming on here daily and being flooded with messages that say 'you're a fake and need to get the fuck out of here' how the hell do I come off as fake? That makes no sense whatsoever to me. None at all. The fact that I'm afraid to come onto this site means that it's not any safer than a street in Atlanta. Which is saying alot...Of course, that's not the only reasong I'm leaving. I'm also leaving because I need to find myself again. I need to figure out who I am, Everyone knows that awhile back I had attempted suicide and it didn't work out too well. Well, ever since then, I've felt utterly lost and not sure where to turn next. Every mistake seems to get worse and worse after the previous one. I have no idea what to do with myself and I can't live with myself after that, with the shame of disappointing my closest friends on here. As pathetic as it sounds, I cry myself to sleep every night thinking of how I let everyone down during this and how horrible I feel and how sick of myself I am at the fact that I'd do something like that. I'm tired of hating myself more and more everyday, and I'm tired of my friends having to worry that I'm going to go and off myself because of something dumb that happened. Well, now that I've thought long and hard about it, I might just take a break from this annoying site and get to know myself again. There's three people on this site who know me more than I ever knew my ownself. And you two know who you are. I talk to you everyday and when I do, I learn more about myself and about you two. I'm not going to say who they are, in case they don't want me to. <3 But, I want to know when people will learn that lonliness and depression can't be cured by medicine, or friendly people, or institutes, but it has to be cured by the person who has it. And I've come to realize that and now I've got to make it happen. I've got to find away to make myself truly happy again, and not feed off of fake smiles and false happiness for others. There's got to be some way. Someone promised that they'd help me with this, but they left and so I've got to find a new outlet for this. Well, there's a train leaving town on Friday that I'm going to take and get out of this town for a little while.

For my besties on here ---------> I love you..

If you want to contact me, my yahoo is xoxosmilingskitzxoxo@yahoo.com, my msn is vampireruler14@hotmail.com, and my number is 770-728-2472. I'll try my hardest to keep in touch with those whom email me or whatever the best I can.

Audio (only names)

Sell your soul

Comments:

xxsupwithuxx added this comment 2009-10-21 10:43:27-05:00

hmm i'm not gonna read that =/ but it's ur choice if u wanna leave.. soo.. bye! =]

masseyandpanda1997 added this comment 2009-10-20 21:00:29-05:00

hey dont leave the ppl that say ur fake block them k because i know that everyones real but no one on this site has the right to call someone fake pls dont leave

masseyandpanda1997 added this comment 2009-10-20 20:49:17-05:00

hey dont leave the ppl that say ur fake block them k because i know that everyones real but no one on this site has the right to call someone fake pls dont leave

lilweezy added this comment 2009-10-20 12:11:42-05:00

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT ?? U R LEAVEING NO WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY U R MY FRN N BEST FRN U CANT DO THAT AT ME NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PLZ DONT LEAVE !!!! =(

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